So, I performed my morning ablutions. When I first heard this word I knew it had something to do with the church. I looked it up and it means bathing or cleansing. You had to clean up before praying. Don't get me started on anything religious based please.
Part of my daily routine should be yoga because it relaxes me and calms my anxiety tremendously. Do I do it? No! Only when my anxiety gets out of hand do I run to do yoga. Typical, I know what to do but I wait until things get bad. That's about when I'm suffering, through my own choice.
I did about fifteen minutes this morning and then should do more later. See that qualifier back there. Meditation and yoga work really well for me. I'm not saying that I'm serene but I feel eighty percent better. Of course blabbing er sorry, blogging, to you helps so much too. It's cleansing don't you know.
Anyways, I can feel some humming in my body which tell me excess energy still needs to go.
What's causing the anxiety? Lots of stuff. Namely wanting and wanting and not seeing it materialize yet. Yeah, I'm in the trap just like any other person.
The thing about any problem such as this, which is mental by the way, is to find ways to get out of your head. I do that with yoga, meditation, walking, blogging, Bach flower remedies and vitamins.
I'm an introvert and that means that I keep most things to myself and work it out inside. So, there are lots of things buzzing around in there trying to come up with answers.
I'm glad you're here to talk to. Thank you for letting me. Leave me a message too. I'd really like that.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Movement
Does age determine maturity? Should it? Some types are emotional, intellectual, developmental, spiritual, psychological and probably more too. I consider myself mature in most of these areas. Mature to me; meaning logical behaviour, aware of what is happening and capable of changing through experience.
The reason I'm talking about this is that sometimes, now, I feel so stuck in my life. I pray and meditate because I believe in a Higher Power. I know that there is one. I've seen the results manifest in many ways over and over again. Just look at the sky. Take a look at people.
I'm growing physically; I can see the grey hairs and the lines on my face. Let me tell you, there are many. Yet it seems as if nothing is moving. As if my life is at a standstill. Logically, I know this isn't the case.
I try in my "bullish" way to move it by using my will. Typical Taurus behaviour, I know. You'd think that I would have learned by now(maturity eh). "Life does not move by ones will alone".
There's a flow there. I have to get into the flow. How do I do it? What do I need to do? I keep asking myself these questions because I am feeling so frustrated with my life. At this age I should have some answers.
I especially need a job to pay the bills. I send out resume after resume yet still not a call has come my way. I need a boost again. Bill collectors are buzzing like buzzards on dead meat. Gross, I know. That's how it feels at the moment.
Still, I know that I have it pretty good. I do thank my Higher Power and family that support me while I'm living this experience. I know that it's only temporary even if doesn't feel like it. Tomorrow is another day.
The reason I'm talking about this is that sometimes, now, I feel so stuck in my life. I pray and meditate because I believe in a Higher Power. I know that there is one. I've seen the results manifest in many ways over and over again. Just look at the sky. Take a look at people.
I'm growing physically; I can see the grey hairs and the lines on my face. Let me tell you, there are many. Yet it seems as if nothing is moving. As if my life is at a standstill. Logically, I know this isn't the case.
I try in my "bullish" way to move it by using my will. Typical Taurus behaviour, I know. You'd think that I would have learned by now(maturity eh). "Life does not move by ones will alone".
There's a flow there. I have to get into the flow. How do I do it? What do I need to do? I keep asking myself these questions because I am feeling so frustrated with my life. At this age I should have some answers.
I especially need a job to pay the bills. I send out resume after resume yet still not a call has come my way. I need a boost again. Bill collectors are buzzing like buzzards on dead meat. Gross, I know. That's how it feels at the moment.
Still, I know that I have it pretty good. I do thank my Higher Power and family that support me while I'm living this experience. I know that it's only temporary even if doesn't feel like it. Tomorrow is another day.
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