Monday, March 28, 2011

Single Parenting and A New Bf

My life has changed.  A little bit.  Ok, maybe a lot.  I recently met someone after a long, long time alone.  It was partly by choice.  The alone time, that is.  It's taken me a big slice of time to actively seek to find someone.

I can only speak for myself and say that before, during and after a divorce, so much of myself was physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually shaken.  It's such a dramatic shift from being a couple to being single again.  That whole shift has taken me quite sometime to get used to.  Change is inevitable. Sometimes it takes a long time in coming.  But eventually it arrives.  We can choose to embrace it or fight it.

I went searching for this new friend online since it's the new meeting place.  I kept an open mind because why should I place limits on where to find friendship.  Online is just as good as any other place such as the store, park, or club.  Granted these places call for person to person contact.  All I had to do was agree to meet somewhere public to decide if I liked the person and wanted to stick around.  That said, safety is necessary in any situation.

One of the biggest deals with having someone new in my life is deciding whether he should meet my kids.  That has to do with whether I expect our relationship to be a long term one.  So far, he's been staying away from them because I'm not ready for them to meet each other.  He's been good about the whole thing and just sees me as a cautious parent since he's been through that already.

I want us to remain good friends right now and I'm not in a hurry to make any drastic changes like moving in with him.  He's a good guy and he's genuine.  Still, the rabbit in my sign urges me to take things nice and slow.


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  2. I can understand where you're coming from - I would also keep my little boy away from any new men in my life, if one came along. Sure, he is little still and loves meeting new people, but for me, it would feel wrong to suddenly bring a new guy around, especially if I wasn't sure if this guy was at least staying around for a while.